This is my fifth post since about a month ago, but it is the first post which I am (intending to) put some effort in writing. The last four posts are, for your information, posts which I type for the sake of typing, for the sake of updating my blog, for the sake of not letting my blog die.
I cannot guarantee that I will update my blog like this from now on. Perhaps after typing this post I may leave it even more outdated. If I could I would update like this, of course. But laziness is a factor. Time is another factor.
Laziness has always been a limiting factor for me. I know very well I can stretch my potential further, but you know actions speak louder than words. I never seem to be meeting my own expectations when it comes to being hardworking. You know like how they grade your Project Work, from best to worst: Exceeding Expectations, Meeting Expectations, Approaching Expectations, Nil. I'm somewhere between AE and nil.
I wonder why people use "actions speak louder than words". Of course I am no exception, because I can't find a shorter and a more powerful string of words to use. This idiom in itself is powerful in argument, but literally, it is meaningless. Actions speak louder than words, but it does not mean that the softer party always loses. The loud one shows that he is confident of what he is saying, confident that he is correct. Being soft does not mean that he is not confident, he probably has already given up trying to argue back with the loud one, the adamant yet stupid one.
"Time is not just a magazine". It was said by a senior. Upon entering a Junior College, it just dawned on me that this is really true. Time is so precious that no money can buy. Every minute is precious. You will get a scolding from the Principal for being in the hall at 7.42am when you have to gather at 7.40am. But on a more serious note, time seems tighter the older I get. I did not really see the problem of time constraints last time. Teachers seemed to finish their lessons on time and did not rush for time. But things here are different now. You have lecturers rushing through 20 pages of lecture notes within 1 hour, and not even being able to finish the lecture. The lecturer's name is not important, so let us call him 'Mr Chang'.
Once I was waiting outside the chemistry laboratories for my practical session. While waiting I took a look at the notice boards just outside the laboratories. I noticed that the whole year's lectures timetable was printed out already. And just a side note, we were quite behind time for the chemistry lectures. From there I noticed how tight time was. There was almost no more buffer weeks that they could afford. That means do or die, the lecturers have to complete their lectures by a stipulated week. That explained why Mr Chang was rushing through the last part of his lecture. I never had this problem in Victoria School, when the teachers seem so free in their schedule. Now, every minute is so important, there is absolutely no time to waste.
Because of that, whatever I do requires a schedule to follow, a timetable, a structure. Of course the timetables I come up with do not work on me. Take today for example. I planned to finish chemistry and mathematics tutorials, assignments for the latter, finish studying chemistry to prepare for this coming week's lecture test, read General Paper article and do some Physics. But so far I have only done mathematics and studied for chemistry lecture test. This proves my point exactly - time is so tight that I got to finish all these by this weekend, but my laziness got over me.
I am not really sure if it is VS or VJ which has taught me to be more structured, but my guess is the latter. VS (and its geography elective) has taught me to bullshit, like what I have been doing so far. VJ has taught me to bullshit while following a format. Education certainly has something to progress from! Notice that this post is quite structured. First two paragraphs introduce why I have not been updating and give two reasons. The next two paragraphs talk about the first reason - laziness (actually paragraph four is bullshit if you have not noticed) and the next two is about time. Then the discussion shifts to being structured. I have no idea how the rest of this post will be about, where it will lead me to, where it will end, etc.
Being structured is not easy. Firstly, you have to know everything that needs to be said/done. If you are really smart then you do not need to write them down, but if you cannot process everything in your mind then you should jot down these things. After that then can you start arranging the points into a certain format to follow. It seems easy, but it is not. Some things are not like science where you can just 'know everything' and just jot them down. Also, arranging these points into something logical and something which flows is no mean feat too.
In case you are wondering, I was actually referring to something I had done for VS choir. I planned early this year to talk to the new committee. Talk about what? Choir stuffs of course, but the topic is so broad that I did not know where to start from. But by forcing myself to find an area to talk about, I have gradually built up the skill to be able to be structured, a skill which will remain with me for the rest of my life. By the way I have lost an interest to talk to them, mainly because of two reasons: lack of time (no, not because I am lazy now), and because I feel that the new committee should be able to manage on their own.
Being structured has its downsides as well. You become too inflexible in the things you do. You do not take into account human nature. You become too involved in the schedule you have to follow. This will lead to criticisms to your actions especially if you hold a high post in a particular co-curricular activity, and especially when that CCA has members who are leaders in themselves. Issues need to be brought up, discussions need to be made and time and effort need to be spent (read: lack of time and laziness).
The solution? To strike a balance, so that people will not argue with you. You cannot be too structured, yet cannot be too flexible (otherwise you do no productive work). It seems easy, but if you think you have struck the balance, do think again. Are you feeding the baby on the nose? Are you sure you have struck the balance? You cannot feed the baby with food too high in nutritional value (being too structured) because it will not eat too high quality food. The other side is the same. You have to add some garnish to make it look appetizing, and a bit of salt and pepper to make it taste nice. In this context, you have to know exactly what you are doing, by memorising the whole schedule in your head and not just follow it blindly or not even following it at all, then use the schedule to suit to people's needs. Being structured is level two, level three is knowing how to strike the balance.
These levels increase with increasing level of maturity, and longer time of course. So let M be the level of maturity and T be the length of time. So the equation M = kT is set up, where k is a constant. The constant varies from person to person. Some people have a small k, which means that they take longer to become more matured. Some people do not even fit into this equation, their level of maturity against time goes like a logarithm curve, like M = p lg(T), where p is another constant. For those who cannot visualise or are lazy to take out a calculator, the curve shows a decreasing rate of increase in maturity with respect to time. Although the curve has no horizontal asymptotes (the level of maturity has no limit), it takes even longer to achieve a even higher level of maturity. Just like in Maple Story or even other role-playing games, the higher your level, the longer it takes to level up.
Take note that the level of arrogance has no relationship with the level of maturity. Some may argue that arrogance will directly influence the level of maturity because if you are arrogant, you do not know the right from wrong and hence your level of maturity decreases. The fact is that there is no direct way of measuring maturity. My definition is that maturity is how open-minded a person is and it does not decrease under normal circumstances (except in accidents or illnesses). But the level of arrogance can float at any point in time. Once you become mature, you show off to the world, only to be neglected and rejected by the world. You start to realise it, and your maturity increases while your arrogance decreases, both being good news of course. Then the cycle repeats and your arrogance level looks like a sin curve. Some people may determine from this post (or in fact, from me) that I am arrogant. I take it as a compliment because it shows that I am more matured than before. For those who are really serious that I am arrogant, ok I am sorry, but I will try to change.
This is the result of the education I am receiving now. I can describe it in one short sentence: it is driving me up the wall! It causes some mild head damage which leads one to blog in such a manner. And if you had lasted all the way here honestly (and correctly, by reading through all the bullshits and not just scrolling down in under two seconds), I congratulate you, and I hereby propose you a job which you may have some future in: marker of geography examination papers. I have no time now, I need to go sleep already.
"Time is not just a magazine."
I cannot guarantee that I will update my blog like this from now on. Perhaps after typing this post I may leave it even more outdated. If I could I would update like this, of course. But laziness is a factor. Time is another factor.
Laziness has always been a limiting factor for me. I know very well I can stretch my potential further, but you know actions speak louder than words. I never seem to be meeting my own expectations when it comes to being hardworking. You know like how they grade your Project Work, from best to worst: Exceeding Expectations, Meeting Expectations, Approaching Expectations, Nil. I'm somewhere between AE and nil.
I wonder why people use "actions speak louder than words". Of course I am no exception, because I can't find a shorter and a more powerful string of words to use. This idiom in itself is powerful in argument, but literally, it is meaningless. Actions speak louder than words, but it does not mean that the softer party always loses. The loud one shows that he is confident of what he is saying, confident that he is correct. Being soft does not mean that he is not confident, he probably has already given up trying to argue back with the loud one, the adamant yet stupid one.
"Time is not just a magazine". It was said by a senior. Upon entering a Junior College, it just dawned on me that this is really true. Time is so precious that no money can buy. Every minute is precious. You will get a scolding from the Principal for being in the hall at 7.42am when you have to gather at 7.40am. But on a more serious note, time seems tighter the older I get. I did not really see the problem of time constraints last time. Teachers seemed to finish their lessons on time and did not rush for time. But things here are different now. You have lecturers rushing through 20 pages of lecture notes within 1 hour, and not even being able to finish the lecture. The lecturer's name is not important, so let us call him 'Mr Chang'.
Once I was waiting outside the chemistry laboratories for my practical session. While waiting I took a look at the notice boards just outside the laboratories. I noticed that the whole year's lectures timetable was printed out already. And just a side note, we were quite behind time for the chemistry lectures. From there I noticed how tight time was. There was almost no more buffer weeks that they could afford. That means do or die, the lecturers have to complete their lectures by a stipulated week. That explained why Mr Chang was rushing through the last part of his lecture. I never had this problem in Victoria School, when the teachers seem so free in their schedule. Now, every minute is so important, there is absolutely no time to waste.
Because of that, whatever I do requires a schedule to follow, a timetable, a structure. Of course the timetables I come up with do not work on me. Take today for example. I planned to finish chemistry and mathematics tutorials, assignments for the latter, finish studying chemistry to prepare for this coming week's lecture test, read General Paper article and do some Physics. But so far I have only done mathematics and studied for chemistry lecture test. This proves my point exactly - time is so tight that I got to finish all these by this weekend, but my laziness got over me.
I am not really sure if it is VS or VJ which has taught me to be more structured, but my guess is the latter. VS (and its geography elective) has taught me to bullshit, like what I have been doing so far. VJ has taught me to bullshit while following a format. Education certainly has something to progress from! Notice that this post is quite structured. First two paragraphs introduce why I have not been updating and give two reasons. The next two paragraphs talk about the first reason - laziness (actually paragraph four is bullshit if you have not noticed) and the next two is about time. Then the discussion shifts to being structured. I have no idea how the rest of this post will be about, where it will lead me to, where it will end, etc.
Being structured is not easy. Firstly, you have to know everything that needs to be said/done. If you are really smart then you do not need to write them down, but if you cannot process everything in your mind then you should jot down these things. After that then can you start arranging the points into a certain format to follow. It seems easy, but it is not. Some things are not like science where you can just 'know everything' and just jot them down. Also, arranging these points into something logical and something which flows is no mean feat too.
In case you are wondering, I was actually referring to something I had done for VS choir. I planned early this year to talk to the new committee. Talk about what? Choir stuffs of course, but the topic is so broad that I did not know where to start from. But by forcing myself to find an area to talk about, I have gradually built up the skill to be able to be structured, a skill which will remain with me for the rest of my life. By the way I have lost an interest to talk to them, mainly because of two reasons: lack of time (no, not because I am lazy now), and because I feel that the new committee should be able to manage on their own.
Being structured has its downsides as well. You become too inflexible in the things you do. You do not take into account human nature. You become too involved in the schedule you have to follow. This will lead to criticisms to your actions especially if you hold a high post in a particular co-curricular activity, and especially when that CCA has members who are leaders in themselves. Issues need to be brought up, discussions need to be made and time and effort need to be spent (read: lack of time and laziness).
The solution? To strike a balance, so that people will not argue with you. You cannot be too structured, yet cannot be too flexible (otherwise you do no productive work). It seems easy, but if you think you have struck the balance, do think again. Are you feeding the baby on the nose? Are you sure you have struck the balance? You cannot feed the baby with food too high in nutritional value (being too structured) because it will not eat too high quality food. The other side is the same. You have to add some garnish to make it look appetizing, and a bit of salt and pepper to make it taste nice. In this context, you have to know exactly what you are doing, by memorising the whole schedule in your head and not just follow it blindly or not even following it at all, then use the schedule to suit to people's needs. Being structured is level two, level three is knowing how to strike the balance.
These levels increase with increasing level of maturity, and longer time of course. So let M be the level of maturity and T be the length of time. So the equation M = kT is set up, where k is a constant. The constant varies from person to person. Some people have a small k, which means that they take longer to become more matured. Some people do not even fit into this equation, their level of maturity against time goes like a logarithm curve, like M = p lg(T), where p is another constant. For those who cannot visualise or are lazy to take out a calculator, the curve shows a decreasing rate of increase in maturity with respect to time. Although the curve has no horizontal asymptotes (the level of maturity has no limit), it takes even longer to achieve a even higher level of maturity. Just like in Maple Story or even other role-playing games, the higher your level, the longer it takes to level up.
Take note that the level of arrogance has no relationship with the level of maturity. Some may argue that arrogance will directly influence the level of maturity because if you are arrogant, you do not know the right from wrong and hence your level of maturity decreases. The fact is that there is no direct way of measuring maturity. My definition is that maturity is how open-minded a person is and it does not decrease under normal circumstances (except in accidents or illnesses). But the level of arrogance can float at any point in time. Once you become mature, you show off to the world, only to be neglected and rejected by the world. You start to realise it, and your maturity increases while your arrogance decreases, both being good news of course. Then the cycle repeats and your arrogance level looks like a sin curve. Some people may determine from this post (or in fact, from me) that I am arrogant. I take it as a compliment because it shows that I am more matured than before. For those who are really serious that I am arrogant, ok I am sorry, but I will try to change.
This is the result of the education I am receiving now. I can describe it in one short sentence: it is driving me up the wall! It causes some mild head damage which leads one to blog in such a manner. And if you had lasted all the way here honestly (and correctly, by reading through all the bullshits and not just scrolling down in under two seconds), I congratulate you, and I hereby propose you a job which you may have some future in: marker of geography examination papers. I have no time now, I need to go sleep already.
"Time is not just a magazine."
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