I lost my protractor some day during the holidays, so I went to the school bookstore to buy a new one. Unfortunately, all they have was protractors or set squares manufactured by Ahkan. I was warned by Mr Pang that Ahkan's protractors are not good because their accuracy is quite off. So in the end, I just bought one protractor yesterday at a shop below my house.

This morning I was looking at my protractor along with its plastic case, and I realised that there were some "matters needing attention" written at the back of the protractor casing. Lucky this was made in China, otherwise I wouldn't have known the meaning of those without the Chinese words. The picture to the left is the scanned picture of the cover.

Haha other people from my class were having quite a nice time laughing at the language. I think the company just went to some translator online and bluff their way through.

During recess I was quite sian, so I anyhow doodled on the whiteboard and eventually came to this (extended version):

To prove that graphs do not exist

Start off with integration...
∫(x² + 4x + 3) dx
= ∫x² dx + ∫4x dx + ∫3 dx
= (x³/3 + c) + (2x² + c) + (3x + c), where c is the arbitrary constant^[1]
= x³/3 - 2x² + 3x + c + c + c -------- (1)
= x³/3 - 2x² + 3x + c -------- (2) (because arbitrary constants do not add up)

Let's take (1) minus (2):
c + c + c - c = 0 (since they are equal)
2c = 0
c = 0

Now let's have a linear equation:
y = mx + c -------- (3)

and Einstein's famous formula^[2]
e = mc²

Converted into:
m = e/c² -------- (4)

Sub (4) into (3):
y = (e/c²)*x + c
y = ex/c² + c³/c²
y = (ex + c³) / c²
yc² = ex + c³

Because c = 0 as proven earlier,
0 = ex + 0
ex = 0
e = 0 or x = 0

Now we know e = 0 is not applicable because e = 2.718... ^[3]
Therefore, x = 0.

Sub x = 0 and c = 0 into (3):
y = 0 + 0
y = 0

Therefore, x = 0, y = 0 for any values of m, and for any given equations.

Epilogue: Because x = y = 0 for everything, graphs do not exist. If you start drawing a line on the graph paper, I would use THIS proof to tell you that you are doing the wrong thing. Perhaps the only thing you can mess with on the graph paper is drawing the axes and maybe drawing the origin only, since x = y = 0.

Oh by the way, I call this "rubbish", and when Mr Pang saw this on the whiteboard, he calls this "nonsense".